Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Which Nightmare Before Christmas Character Are You?
What Tim Burton Movie Do You Belong In?
Which Fantastical Creature Suits Your Style?
Which Caribbean Pirate are you most like?
What Type of Fairy Are You?
Which Horror Killer Are You?
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100 Questions Updated
SIMPLE QUESTIONS:
1. Name: Krystal
2. Nickname: Twinkie, Banana, Banana Twinkie, Midget, Shorty, Bubble Butt
3. Eyes: They Change Colours
4. Height: 5 foot
5. Hair: Naturally Dark Brown
6. Siblings: 1 Brother I Know, 4 I don't
7. Do you like to sing in the shower? No
9. Birthday: October 20, 1989
10. Star Sign: Libra
11. Religion: Native American - Wiccan/Pagan
12. Male/Female: Female
13. Righty or lefty: Lefty
14. What's the most important thing that every relationship should have? Communication
15. What type of music do you prefer? Darkwave/Rock
16. Marital status: Dating
17. Do you have a car? No
18. What kind of car do you have/want: Mustang
FAVORITE QUESTIONS:
19. Movie: Rent
20. Song: La Vie Boheme (Rent)
21. Band/singer? Delerium
22. TV Show: Clean House
23. Actor: Johnny Depp
24. Actress: Drew Barrymoore
26. Number: 86
27. Cartoon character: Stewie Griffin
28. Disney Character: Tinkerbell
29. Colour: Lavender
LOVE LIFE ETC:
30. Do you plan on having children:Yes
31. Do you want to get married: Yes
33. How old do you want be when you get married: When It Feels Right
34. Would you have kids before marriage: No
35. Do u have a b/f or g/f: Yes
EITHER-OR (PICK WHICH ONE YOU PREFER)
38. Music/TV: Music
39. Guys/Girls: Guys
40. Green/Blue: Green
41. Pink/Purple: Purple
42. Summer/Winter: Summer
43. Night/Day: Night
44. Hangin Out/Chillin: Hangin Out
45. Dopey/Funny: Funny
46. Where do you live? Maryland
48. Have you ever taken drugs? No
49. What's a major turn on for you? Respect
50. Your favorite food: Mac N Cheese
51. Where would you most like to live in the world? Europe, Norway, Russia
52. Which 5 people do you trust the most? Matt, Becky.......Matt......Becky.......Fizzle
53. What do you think of soul mates? It Could Happen
54. Is it right to flirt if you have a bf/gf? Look Don't Touch
55: What was the last thing you cried over or got teary about? MOM
56. What's something about guys/girls you don't get? A LOT
57. Are you happy? Somewhat
58. Why? Depends On The Day
59. What's an object you can't live without? Matt/Becky
60. Love or lust: Love
61. Silver or gold: Silver
62. Diamond or pearl: Pearl
64. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping? Yes
65. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?: No
66. Do you have any piercings: No
67. What colour underpants are you wearing right now: Uhm....About That
68. What song are you listening to right now? The Keyboard
69: What mythical creature would you be? Faerie
70. Where would you want to go on your honeymoon? Russia
71. Who do u want to spend the rest of your life with? Matt
72. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex: Personality
74. What makes you happy? Friendship
75. What's the next CD you're gonna get? God Only Knows
76. Do you wear contacts or glasses? Reading Glasses
77. What's the best advice given to you? Just Move On
78. Have you ever won any special awards? Honor Roll, Presidential Award.....
79. What are your future goals: Go To College, Open A Daycare, Get Married, Have Kids, Adopt Children, Become A Foster Parent
80. Worst sickness you ever had? Mono
81. Do you like Funny or Scary movies better? Scary
82. On the phone or in person? In Person
83. Hugs or kisses? Hugs
84. What song seems to reflect you the most? Shove It By Santogold
85. If you died tomorrow who would you leave everything you own to? Becky and Matt
86. Do you have any enemies? Nah
89. What time is it now? 12:51 AM
90. Have you ever been in love? Yes
91. Have you met Santa? Sure ~_^
92. If E.T. knocked on your door holding a peace sign and asking to use your phone what would you do? Let Him In
93. Last time you talked to the person that you like: 10:00PM
94. Do you have any pets? A Cat, A Hamster, A Fish, and A Guinea Pig
95. What is your favorite word or saying? Taco
96. Last time you were depressed: Today
97. Are you an alcoholic? Nah
98. Who's your closest friend? Becky
99. What do you think of this person: She's The Greatest
100. What are you wearing right now? PJ Pants, T-shirt, Hoodie, and Socks
1. Name: Krystal
2. Nickname: Twinkie, Banana, Banana Twinkie, Midget, Shorty, Bubble Butt
3. Eyes: They Change Colours
4. Height: 5 foot
5. Hair: Naturally Dark Brown
6. Siblings: 1 Brother I Know, 4 I don't
7. Do you like to sing in the shower? No
9. Birthday: October 20, 1989
10. Star Sign: Libra
11. Religion: Native American - Wiccan/Pagan
12. Male/Female: Female
13. Righty or lefty: Lefty
14. What's the most important thing that every relationship should have? Communication
15. What type of music do you prefer? Darkwave/Rock
16. Marital status: Dating
17. Do you have a car? No
18. What kind of car do you have/want: Mustang
FAVORITE QUESTIONS:
19. Movie: Rent
20. Song: La Vie Boheme (Rent)
21. Band/singer? Delerium
22. TV Show: Clean House
23. Actor: Johnny Depp
24. Actress: Drew Barrymoore
26. Number: 86
27. Cartoon character: Stewie Griffin
28. Disney Character: Tinkerbell
29. Colour: Lavender
LOVE LIFE ETC:
30. Do you plan on having children:Yes
31. Do you want to get married: Yes
33. How old do you want be when you get married: When It Feels Right
34. Would you have kids before marriage: No
35. Do u have a b/f or g/f: Yes
EITHER-OR (PICK WHICH ONE YOU PREFER)
38. Music/TV: Music
39. Guys/Girls: Guys
40. Green/Blue: Green
41. Pink/Purple: Purple
42. Summer/Winter: Summer
43. Night/Day: Night
44. Hangin Out/Chillin: Hangin Out
45. Dopey/Funny: Funny
46. Where do you live? Maryland
48. Have you ever taken drugs? No
49. What's a major turn on for you? Respect
50. Your favorite food: Mac N Cheese
51. Where would you most like to live in the world? Europe, Norway, Russia
52. Which 5 people do you trust the most? Matt, Becky.......Matt......Becky.......Fizzle
53. What do you think of soul mates? It Could Happen
54. Is it right to flirt if you have a bf/gf? Look Don't Touch
55: What was the last thing you cried over or got teary about? MOM
56. What's something about guys/girls you don't get? A LOT
57. Are you happy? Somewhat
58. Why? Depends On The Day
59. What's an object you can't live without? Matt/Becky
60. Love or lust: Love
61. Silver or gold: Silver
62. Diamond or pearl: Pearl
64. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping? Yes
65. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?: No
66. Do you have any piercings: No
67. What colour underpants are you wearing right now: Uhm....About That
68. What song are you listening to right now? The Keyboard
69: What mythical creature would you be? Faerie
70. Where would you want to go on your honeymoon? Russia
71. Who do u want to spend the rest of your life with? Matt
72. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex: Personality
74. What makes you happy? Friendship
75. What's the next CD you're gonna get? God Only Knows
76. Do you wear contacts or glasses? Reading Glasses
77. What's the best advice given to you? Just Move On
78. Have you ever won any special awards? Honor Roll, Presidential Award.....
79. What are your future goals: Go To College, Open A Daycare, Get Married, Have Kids, Adopt Children, Become A Foster Parent
80. Worst sickness you ever had? Mono
81. Do you like Funny or Scary movies better? Scary
82. On the phone or in person? In Person
83. Hugs or kisses? Hugs
84. What song seems to reflect you the most? Shove It By Santogold
85. If you died tomorrow who would you leave everything you own to? Becky and Matt
86. Do you have any enemies? Nah
89. What time is it now? 12:51 AM
90. Have you ever been in love? Yes
91. Have you met Santa? Sure ~_^
92. If E.T. knocked on your door holding a peace sign and asking to use your phone what would you do? Let Him In
93. Last time you talked to the person that you like: 10:00PM
94. Do you have any pets? A Cat, A Hamster, A Fish, and A Guinea Pig
95. What is your favorite word or saying? Taco
96. Last time you were depressed: Today
97. Are you an alcoholic? Nah
98. Who's your closest friend? Becky
99. What do you think of this person: She's The Greatest
100. What are you wearing right now? PJ Pants, T-shirt, Hoodie, and Socks
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
An Old RP That I Wanted To Share
Ok, this RP is about a group of "Aliens" (Arie Lyn) that are after a girl named Artemis. I the leader of a rival group to the Aliens and I want to find the girl to hold her against the leader of the Aliens, because they took my sister.
Lunaria Amaryllis was a small human who was only about 5 feet tall. She, of course, was fully grown but height was not a gift she was granted in her genes. She was born twenty six years ago on the planet earth to her mother Matilda and father Aaron. She then sat back in her chair and remembered how things used to be when she was younger and playing with her smaller yet taller sister Solaria. They used to play barbies and ring-around-the-rosie day after day until when Lunaria was five and Solaria was three their parents died.
The death of Matilda and Aaron Amaryllis was deemed an accident by the police but Lunaria knew different. The reports all had said that there were "mysterious circumstances" surrounding their death and that there was always one person these all lead to. His name was never written down and his location was never disclosed but she knew that their death was never really an accident. The night that they had died Lunaria and Solaria were at home with their uncle whilst their parents had left to go out for dinner on their ten year anniversary. Later that night when her and her sister were getting ready to go to bed there was a knock on the door. Lunaria stood on the stairs and watched as their watchful relative answered the door. That night was the last night that she would ever spend in her house again.
As the years passed Lunaria and her sister Solaria were moved around from orphanage to orphanage. Throughout all of the years they were never separated and no relative ever wanted the responsibility of two small girls. When Lunaria was nine, she and her sister had decided to leave the orphanage and try to make it in the real world. They had taken all of the money that they could find laying around and in the office of the head mistress. As they they left they were confronted by two "men". They grabbed the two girls and took them away, separating them for the rest of their lives.
As Lunaria awoke in her new environment she was terrified and curious all at once. She had many thoughts pass through her mind, first of which was where Solaria had been taken. As time went by Lunaria grew to know the people that took her, as Aliens, the Arie Lyn to be exact. They took care of her, and treated her as one of them. They even granted her with two very unique gifts that the Arie Lyn didn't have themselves. Lunaria learned how to control time and stop it for a total of ten minutes, but alas as those minutes passed she grew more exhausted and weaker with every second. The only major downfall though of this gift was that if she froze time for the entire ten minutes she would become unconscious. Her other gift was to emit an aura like shield around her body at a two foot radius. She always hated the Arie Lyn for taking her and her sister, and most of all for separating them. Lunaria never knew what had happened to Solaria but she vowed to find out.
Lunaria sat at her desk in her nice comfy chair with her feet propped up. She spun a pen between her fingers thinking of what her next move would be to try to get to Fontaine. There wasn't much she hadn't already tried but she had to figure something out. She had taken countless amounts of his soldiers and mangled their bodies and sent them back to him piece by piece. There was nothing. She had taken his men heads and placed them on stakes outside of her place "Dracula" style to see what he would do. There was nothing. She had taken the organs of his men fried them up and sent them back to him telling him that it was a tasty treat that he would enjoy and then after she was sure he had had time to eat it she sent another note to tell him that it was his men. Still there was nothing. Fontaine would not tell her where the location of her sister was and Lunaria needed to decide on something so devious, so horrible, or so maniacal that would bring him to his knees begging.
Suddenly the doors to Lunaria's office opened and in walked her second in command, Dimitrius. "My mistress, we have discovered Fontaine's new plans. He has taken the Alecland leader, and is now trying to find the daughter of said leader. The daughter goes by the name of Artemis. Fontaine's gypsy ally, Eclipse, is now in pursuit of the daughter planning to befriend her and trick her into going back to Fontaine."
Lunaria raised her hand at this and looked at her second, "That will be all Dimi, I will decide what to do from that. Thank you. You can leave now." She sat at her desk now pondering how to use this information against her enemy. Some how, some way, Lunaria would get her sister back.
Lunaria Amaryllis was a small human who was only about 5 feet tall. She, of course, was fully grown but height was not a gift she was granted in her genes. She was born twenty six years ago on the planet earth to her mother Matilda and father Aaron. She then sat back in her chair and remembered how things used to be when she was younger and playing with her smaller yet taller sister Solaria. They used to play barbies and ring-around-the-rosie day after day until when Lunaria was five and Solaria was three their parents died.
The death of Matilda and Aaron Amaryllis was deemed an accident by the police but Lunaria knew different. The reports all had said that there were "mysterious circumstances" surrounding their death and that there was always one person these all lead to. His name was never written down and his location was never disclosed but she knew that their death was never really an accident. The night that they had died Lunaria and Solaria were at home with their uncle whilst their parents had left to go out for dinner on their ten year anniversary. Later that night when her and her sister were getting ready to go to bed there was a knock on the door. Lunaria stood on the stairs and watched as their watchful relative answered the door. That night was the last night that she would ever spend in her house again.
As the years passed Lunaria and her sister Solaria were moved around from orphanage to orphanage. Throughout all of the years they were never separated and no relative ever wanted the responsibility of two small girls. When Lunaria was nine, she and her sister had decided to leave the orphanage and try to make it in the real world. They had taken all of the money that they could find laying around and in the office of the head mistress. As they they left they were confronted by two "men". They grabbed the two girls and took them away, separating them for the rest of their lives.
As Lunaria awoke in her new environment she was terrified and curious all at once. She had many thoughts pass through her mind, first of which was where Solaria had been taken. As time went by Lunaria grew to know the people that took her, as Aliens, the Arie Lyn to be exact. They took care of her, and treated her as one of them. They even granted her with two very unique gifts that the Arie Lyn didn't have themselves. Lunaria learned how to control time and stop it for a total of ten minutes, but alas as those minutes passed she grew more exhausted and weaker with every second. The only major downfall though of this gift was that if she froze time for the entire ten minutes she would become unconscious. Her other gift was to emit an aura like shield around her body at a two foot radius. She always hated the Arie Lyn for taking her and her sister, and most of all for separating them. Lunaria never knew what had happened to Solaria but she vowed to find out.
Lunaria sat at her desk in her nice comfy chair with her feet propped up. She spun a pen between her fingers thinking of what her next move would be to try to get to Fontaine. There wasn't much she hadn't already tried but she had to figure something out. She had taken countless amounts of his soldiers and mangled their bodies and sent them back to him piece by piece. There was nothing. She had taken his men heads and placed them on stakes outside of her place "Dracula" style to see what he would do. There was nothing. She had taken the organs of his men fried them up and sent them back to him telling him that it was a tasty treat that he would enjoy and then after she was sure he had had time to eat it she sent another note to tell him that it was his men. Still there was nothing. Fontaine would not tell her where the location of her sister was and Lunaria needed to decide on something so devious, so horrible, or so maniacal that would bring him to his knees begging.
Suddenly the doors to Lunaria's office opened and in walked her second in command, Dimitrius. "My mistress, we have discovered Fontaine's new plans. He has taken the Alecland leader, and is now trying to find the daughter of said leader. The daughter goes by the name of Artemis. Fontaine's gypsy ally, Eclipse, is now in pursuit of the daughter planning to befriend her and trick her into going back to Fontaine."
Lunaria raised her hand at this and looked at her second, "That will be all Dimi, I will decide what to do from that. Thank you. You can leave now." She sat at her desk now pondering how to use this information against her enemy. Some how, some way, Lunaria would get her sister back.
WHO IN THE HELL DOES THAT TYPE OF SHYT!?!?!?! HONESTLY!?!?!?! Part 2
Well, I called my grandmother and she said that I can't borrow any money if I am going to give it to my mom because mom still owes her $11,000. I can understand that but now I am shyt out of luck. WTF!?!? My mom is selling the trailer for $9,000 dollars and my grandmother wants all of it, so how does my mom even expect to be able to leave with NO money, and then she won't even have a place to live. HAHAHA!!!!! Karma is a BITCH!!!!! Now I have to find a job and a place to live with Athena and Pern. SON OF A BITCH!!!!! I might be able to borrow money for that though......I HOPE!!!!! If not we are shyt out of luck. Oh, and to top it off my MOM made me tell my grandmother that she was leaving. How fucking retarded is that!?!? >screams<
Oh and my mom is selling the furniture in the trailer. The furniture she said that I could have!!!! >screams even louder and attempts to rip hair out<
Oh and my mom is selling the furniture in the trailer. The furniture she said that I could have!!!! >screams even louder and attempts to rip hair out<
My Other Names
I was online looking for some free Gothic clothing patterns when I came across a name changer. So here are my other names:
Gothic = Psychotic Sphincter
Biker = Krystal "Psychotic Sphincter" Reid
Basketball = Dwight Reid
Tourettes = Krystal "mothershitfart" Reid
Yeah it was funny to me. Here is the link. Name Generator
Also there is another that is a vampyre name generator.
Gothic = Psychotic Sphincter
Biker = Krystal "Psychotic Sphincter" Reid
Basketball = Dwight Reid
Tourettes = Krystal "mothershitfart" Reid
Yeah it was funny to me. Here is the link. Name Generator
Also there is another that is a vampyre name generator.
The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity:
Rosalind Choiseul
Rosalind Choiseul
Known in some parts of the world as:
Demon of Bulgaria
Demon of Bulgaria
The Great Archives Record:
A flame which never dies, but brightens with the passing of time.
A flame which never dies, but brightens with the passing of time.
WHO IN THE HELL DOES THAT TYPE OF SHYT!?!?!?! HONESTLY!?!?!?!
This is really bothering me. My mom and me have been having issues for some time now but I haven't really said anything to her. Last year around Christmas she separated from the man that I've known as "dad" since I was 3. This was fine with me because he was jerk and always treated me like shyt. Well, while we are still living with him trying to get a place my mom decides that she is going to date the guy that lives across the street. She would disappear for weekends at a time and I would always get bombarded with questions like, "Where did your mother go?", "Who is she fucking now?", "She's with Jimmy isn't she?", and others along the same line. The truth was that she went to a hotel, to fuck Jimmy. I can understand why she left the man but come on while your living in his house do you have to be going around openly fucking the neighbor? No, you don't. She could have waited until we were out of there. At the end of January/beginning of February we finally found a trailer for sale in the trailer park in town.
Whilst all of this was going on, I had come home for the holidays in November from my boyfriends house. While I had been home we had had a very hard break up. I realized that all he wanted was a fucking and to take all of my shyt from me like my iPod, PS2, very expensive clothing and books, movies, and many other things that meant A LOT to me. I was already upset with this happening and I had no where to go because my best friend was grounded for 2 months. So I turned to my neighbor and Athena. Me and Athena had been friends since I was in 7th or 8th grade and my neighbor and I had been friends since his 9th grade year. They are both a year younger than me and I am 19. After a while me and my neighbor realized that we were perfect for each other so we started dating, and have been ever since. Athena was also dealing with he own parental problems at the moment too so we grew closer.
So, mom decided to buy the trailer in the trailer park for $13,000. She borrowed the money from my grandparents and has been paying it back to them slowly, well at least she did for the first few months. So she went back and forth between Jimmy and her ex for the next few months until she finally realized that her ex wasn't for her and she wanted to be with Jimmy. Well, that was all fine and dandy except for the fact that he is a racist, alcoholic bastard. While Jimmy and my mom were separated I began to grow close to my moms friend Patricia that she works with and the only place I could hang out with her was here at the trailer. When Jimmy came back into the picture that ass chased her away and I barely get to see her anymore. I still see my boyfriend (the neighbor) and I hang out with Athena all of the time, but that's not the point. Like right now Patricia needs me and I can't help her because I can never see her. WTF!?!? And Patricia was supposed to be my mom's friend but alas that has changed completely because my mom has become an utter bitch toward everyone because of Jimmy. Well, my mom had some dreams about her ex and now she is scared of him so she wants to move far away, oh, and Jimmy is running from the cops.....let's not forget that detail. So now they want to move away, I am being forced out of my home, and Athena doesn't want to live at home anymore. So when I tell my mom that I'll take the trailer and pay for it and stuff she because a bitch and is like well I need a few thousand to get out of here. Well, when I tell her that I was going to try and borrow a few thousand from my grand parents she bitched and was like they won't give it to you and I haven't even told them that we are leaving yet. WTF!?!?! They are her own parents and she isn't telling them what is happening. My grandfather is practically on his death bed and she wants to leave and go to probably AZ or OK? Who does that? And Jimmy is probably going to screw her over anyway like he has done since they have been together from the beginning. Oh, and she just acquired a new baby grandson. WHO IN THE HELL DOES THAT TYPE OF SHYT!?!?!?! HONESTLY!?!?!?! >screams< I don't know what to do anymore.
Whilst all of this was going on, I had come home for the holidays in November from my boyfriends house. While I had been home we had had a very hard break up. I realized that all he wanted was a fucking and to take all of my shyt from me like my iPod, PS2, very expensive clothing and books, movies, and many other things that meant A LOT to me. I was already upset with this happening and I had no where to go because my best friend was grounded for 2 months. So I turned to my neighbor and Athena. Me and Athena had been friends since I was in 7th or 8th grade and my neighbor and I had been friends since his 9th grade year. They are both a year younger than me and I am 19. After a while me and my neighbor realized that we were perfect for each other so we started dating, and have been ever since. Athena was also dealing with he own parental problems at the moment too so we grew closer.
So, mom decided to buy the trailer in the trailer park for $13,000. She borrowed the money from my grandparents and has been paying it back to them slowly, well at least she did for the first few months. So she went back and forth between Jimmy and her ex for the next few months until she finally realized that her ex wasn't for her and she wanted to be with Jimmy. Well, that was all fine and dandy except for the fact that he is a racist, alcoholic bastard. While Jimmy and my mom were separated I began to grow close to my moms friend Patricia that she works with and the only place I could hang out with her was here at the trailer. When Jimmy came back into the picture that ass chased her away and I barely get to see her anymore. I still see my boyfriend (the neighbor) and I hang out with Athena all of the time, but that's not the point. Like right now Patricia needs me and I can't help her because I can never see her. WTF!?!? And Patricia was supposed to be my mom's friend but alas that has changed completely because my mom has become an utter bitch toward everyone because of Jimmy. Well, my mom had some dreams about her ex and now she is scared of him so she wants to move far away, oh, and Jimmy is running from the cops.....let's not forget that detail. So now they want to move away, I am being forced out of my home, and Athena doesn't want to live at home anymore. So when I tell my mom that I'll take the trailer and pay for it and stuff she because a bitch and is like well I need a few thousand to get out of here. Well, when I tell her that I was going to try and borrow a few thousand from my grand parents she bitched and was like they won't give it to you and I haven't even told them that we are leaving yet. WTF!?!?! They are her own parents and she isn't telling them what is happening. My grandfather is practically on his death bed and she wants to leave and go to probably AZ or OK? Who does that? And Jimmy is probably going to screw her over anyway like he has done since they have been together from the beginning. Oh, and she just acquired a new baby grandson. WHO IN THE HELL DOES THAT TYPE OF SHYT!?!?!?! HONESTLY!?!?!?! >screams< I don't know what to do anymore.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Faerietales are better left for stories; Dreams are better left for night
Life seems to always slap you in the face
Even when your knees have already hit the ground
I've decided to stop reaching to the skies and trying to catch a dream
A dream that I know is never going to come true
There are no sunny skies, green pastures, or rainbows passing by
There is just me, and just you, coexisting in the world that is around us
I used to believe in miracles and happiness
But every time I seem to get them they get taken away
I only have what I hold now and dreams won't keep it here
Faerietales are better left for stories
Dreams are better left for night
I've opened my eyes to the world around me
And all I ever discover is disappointment and pain
With the few small things that still bring me some happiness
I will always hold them close
Keep them here beside me and never let them go
(I know this poem kind of sucks but get over it)
Even when your knees have already hit the ground
I've decided to stop reaching to the skies and trying to catch a dream
A dream that I know is never going to come true
There are no sunny skies, green pastures, or rainbows passing by
There is just me, and just you, coexisting in the world that is around us
I used to believe in miracles and happiness
But every time I seem to get them they get taken away
I only have what I hold now and dreams won't keep it here
Faerietales are better left for stories
Dreams are better left for night
I've opened my eyes to the world around me
And all I ever discover is disappointment and pain
With the few small things that still bring me some happiness
I will always hold them close
Keep them here beside me and never let them go
(I know this poem kind of sucks but get over it)
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